Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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