so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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