At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Actions speak louder than pants.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
Randomize
