Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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