Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
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