Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize