vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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