you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I'm sitting on the toilet just to avoid my bosses look of disapproval
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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