Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Randomize
