i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
