it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
After tacos, we're chasing women.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
We are never doing shots of gin. Never again.
I'm pretty sure that's exactly what we're doing.
Randomize
