Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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