All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
