some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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