I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
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