She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
