i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
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