Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
we're microwaving frozen margaritas its not the same without u
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
Fun fact: My predictive text now prompts "walrus" as the most likely word to follow "intoxicated"...
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
