So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
Randomize
