she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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