I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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