So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
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