K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
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