Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
Randomize
