the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
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