Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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