i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
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