Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
only you would photoshop your dick
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
