Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Randomize
