so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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