: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
