it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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