Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Randomize