Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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