wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
