R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Randomize
