yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize
