"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
