Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I don't think cute and don't forget to get tested belong in the same text
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
