Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
she wants to wait til the kids are asleep so im just shotgunning the parents beers in the pillow fort. I love fucking babysitters
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize
