i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Randomize
