ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
Randomize
