so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize