margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
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