I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
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