Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
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