I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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