I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
