I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize