Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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